Our Ridiculous Journey from Punta del Diablo to Iguacu Falls

California or Porto Alegre?

Our journey began in Punta del Diablo in Uruguay. We walked through the dark through sand dunes and windy forest ‘short cut’ path to the bus stop. The bus was meant to be at 9.20pm, but about that time a bus drove right past us. We then started worrying that we were in the wrong spot but luckily 10 minutes later it came back. The bus was nearly empty.

We drove through the dark, stopping in a couple of smaller villages, to Chuy on the border. They let us out in a ‘plaza’, a square of grass surrounded by construction site gates with hardly any street lights. The conductor told us to walk a block up to Avenue de las Americas. So we walked along the broken pavements in this dreary city. We arrived at the literal border between the two countries, but it was just a normal main road. Not sure who to ask, we went up to man in some kind of ticketing office. He couldn’t speak English but somehow we managed to have a conversation about how the bus stop was 2km away, or a twenty minute walk down a motorway. He told us to get a taxi.

There was one across the road, so we jumped in that. Weary of meter-less taxis taking advantage, we tried to ask the man how much it would cost. He answered in Spanish and keep raving on, we couldn’t keep up. He took us to what looked like a petrol station, but was actually Uruguayan emigration. The taxi driver jumped out and began talking to people, not asking us for payment. He asked around for an English speaker, and a short round man appeared who confirmed we were in the right place for the EGA bus to Porto Alegre. The taxi man was happy and we gave him a tip for being so concerned for us.

We asked three men in full army gear with a gun where the passport office was. It was the third door along, we were told we didn’t need our passports stamped - in Spanish - so we weren’t sure. I barged down the building to the only seating, a bench by an open fire. I asked a stern man ‘es okay asiento, si?’ He didn’t acknowledge us, so we sat down. They were roasting meat and sausages on the open fire, a homeless man was there, plus the English speaker.

We waited in this random building until 1am. At midnight, when we were told the bus would be there, the English speaker said it was another hour away! Luckily they put Avatar in Spanish on the TV while eating their dinner. The man who had been in the ticket office in town showed up and waved to us. All these immigration officials seemed to find it hilarious that two white girls were waiting during the night. I just hoped it wasn’t because we had missed the bus.

Finally the EGA bus showed up. They took our passports for getting through the border, and we clambered onboard right to the back. It was pitch black and everyone was asleep. The people in front of us had reclined their seats so far, we couldn’t get our legs into our chairs. We were stuck! I reclined my chair and fell asleep with my legs tangled and jammed into the seat in front. In the morning as they served coffee, I realised there was a leg rest we hadn’t open up properly – so it was our own fault we couldn’t get our legs in!

We arrived in Porto Alegre. We didn’t have high-hopes for this city, we were just there for our flight the next day. In terms of the language, we were back to square one - we couldn’t say basic greetings, numbers or anything! There were police with guns at the bus station. We changed our remaining Uruguayan pesos to Brazilian real and used the money to get a dodgy little taxi to our hostel.

It was 9am and check in wasn’t until 2pm. We were exhausted and just wanted to shower. But instead we chatted to a man who wanted us to teach his daughter English and got Susie’s whatsapp number. Somehow we dragged ourselves out for a walk in the city. It was a drab place and there were lots more homeless people than Uruguay. We walked to the central market but couldn’t see anything we liked for lunch. A polite boy in the tourism office with perfect English told us to try a posh suburb.

We walked there and found a health food cafe. We were so excited – broccoli salad and coconut water! Not just bread and meat as per usual! A man tried to welcome us at the door, but when language got in the way (instantly), a lady butted in and explained how it worked in English. She made sure to teach us how to read the symbols like gluten free, which were already in English. But that was nice of her so we were grateful.

Then we went to a bank to withdraw money. The door was a revolving one, but it had a metal detector inside. I got through fine, but Susie set it off. There were two guards yelling at her through the door in Portuguese while she was locked inside the door looking petrified. She had to put her phone through the slot to enter. There was nothing I could do – I was locked inside the building now, it was hilarious.

Then we just wanted to use a normal ATM, but a man who couldn’t speak English insisted we use another machine that didn’t work because we didn’t have normal cards. A second man, who could speak English came out and instructed us through the normal ATM (which was already in English once you entered your card). It was awkward and very funny in hindsight.

We walked back to the hostel through the park. We were so tired. And when we got to the hostel at 2pm, our room wasn’t ready for another 40 minutes. We almost left and went to another hostel on the same road. Finally we could shower and brush our teeth. We had dinner at a pizza place in the streets behind our hostel. We tried to learn Portuguese over dinner from my guidebook and couldn’t stop laughing at how terrible we sounded.

We both had upset tummies and spent the evening in our room, unable to talk to anyone except each other, listening to music really loud because the toilet door was paper-thin (just a plastic screen) and laughing at the whole situation.

We got and had breakfast in the hostel. We went for a walk to the pharmacy, there seems to be at least two on every single block in Porto Alegre and they are huge! I bought some more magnesium supplements and Susie asked for teatree oil, which involved three staff and Google translate. We were told they don’t have natural products. There wasn’t any cafes open except one with three men glaring at us, so we went back to the hostel for coffee.

We got an Uber to the airport, it was much cleaner, nicer and cheaper than the taxi! After realising we were in the wrong terminal, getting a bus to the next one, checking in and paying extra for luggage, our flight was delay two hours. We didn’t know this and there were heaps of blaring Portuguese announcements and full volume. Only when we lined up to check-in the lady told us we were actually getting a lunch voucher because the flight was delayed.

Then we had an incredibly embarrassing time trying to order food, with the lady staring at us and just saying ‘nao’ to everything we asked. She didn’t speak English, no one saved us. In the end Susie got no food and I paid extra for a sandwich because we couldn’t work out the voucher. That didn’t matter though, because eventually when we got on the plane we were given chips, lollies and orange juice. And this was a budget airline! Along with my sandwich, I was stuffed!

We touched down in Foz. A nice man sitting behind us piped up as the plane started going down. He was a lawyer and restaurant owner in Foz. He pointed out the Argentinian, Paraguayan and Brazilian borders, plus the falls. It was great! The landscape was dense green jungle with patches of rich red dirt showing on the roads and countryside.

We got a taxi no problems to the hostel. As soon as we walked in the receptionist told us to take our bags off, relax, did we want a glass of water? Our travel nightmare was over!

We unpacked in our large, clean room and then went on a walk to the supermarket. That involved getting lost twice, but the streets were so wide and comparatively quiet, it was sunny, so it didn’t matter. We bought pasta and veges for dinner from this huge supermarket. We spent the evening sitting by the pool talking to other travellers about Brazil while enjoying a local craft beer.